So Steve (the owner of Rockport Automotive) was waiting for us in the driveway to give us a ride to his shop to pick up our minivan. We had studded tires put on for the winter season. It's so nice that they provide that service and I'm really grateful for it! Well, no ride with Li is uneventful. You never know what he will say. (Bless his heart, I of course love him so much!!!)
Steve is very religious. I noticed a bible on his backseat. I put in Makana's car seat and everyone got in and settled. Li was ready for conversation. Before Steve backed down the driveway (wow, I have maybe once done that as it curves..and he went fast too!), Li mentioned the movie Austin Powers (Steve said he never saw it, but knew the basic story), that it had sex in it, and that he and Makana both had a girlfriend, but "Sadly, Katie doesn't." Yikes! Katie told Li to "shut up" and said she had no interest in boys right now. I told Katie that shut up was not nice to say and she could say something else. Steve told us about how he was trying to take his business to the next level. Li went on about how someone told him he should "take it to the next level" regarding his girlfriend. He said that didn't know what that meant. I asked him who said that to him and he said Justin. I said that Justin must have been kidding/teasing. I did feel a bit embarrassed that Steve was hearing Li talk like this.
Katie said that she wondered what Steve thought of our family now. I said the same sort of thing at first, but then said that he has his values and thoughts and opinions and is a nice man and he is entitled to have his own thoughts, values and opinions and that they may differ from ours and that that is okay. I know Li has recently watched Austin Powers and is trying to understand and process many things...sex, girlfriends, etc. He is just expressing to others what is going on in his head. I understand that. Steve may not and that is okay. I did try to explain to Li that it wasn't appropriate to bring all that up in front of Steve, especially since I know that he is very religious and might not approve of what we feel is okay for our family to watch. I don't want Steve to be uncomfortable and I don't want to disrespect the values I think Steve has. That thought makes me uncomfortable. I know Li doesn't understand very much about that all, but I figured it would be a good idea to at least try to explain why we don't say things like that (like out of the blue bring up sex) in front of others.
No more time to write. Need to be with Makana and get her settled in hopes we might transition into bed.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Friday, October 3, 2008
Update On Regular Life
Makana was so cute last night. She was sitting on the little potty seat (which you just place on top of the regular potty seat) and she had a Pippi Longstocking book in her hand. She was reading to me from the book calling out chapters according to whatever page she was on. (I don't mean reading the way most people mean it. I mean making up a story as she goes along. This and page turning and her interest are all part of learning to read. The most important thing is her interest and enjoyment.) If she didn't know the page number (which she called chapter), she'd ask and I'd tell her and on the story would go.
Meanwhile, Li was in the shower. He had just finished pooping and had wiped himself and there were no things from the bathroom in the hallway. The rugs, garbage basket, lotion, toothbrushes, book basket, etc were all in their normal places. The toilet paper was in it's place too. I was surprised he had not taken out the usual things and mentioned this to him so in a casual way while he was making a bath. He said that he wanted to start going to the bathroom the way we all go. I replied that he could do whatever he felt like at the time. Inside I was thinking about how exciting it is how people think about things internally and then make decisions reflecting their latest thoughts. How amazing! And Li is very much a thinker. He cares so much and really takes in things even though outwardly one wouldn't know that. He cares so much about fairness and kindness and generousity*. In the past, I sometimes wondered if I'd be wiping for alot longer. This would be fine to me, but I worried sometimes that he would always need us too and wondered how he would get on in the world if we weren't there to help. And I know that was a silly thought as he has wiped sometimes in the past few months, but not often and that most children do eventually want to wipe themselves as they get older. And if not, that would be a need Jim and I would help him with for as long as possible just like anything else.
* Katie is having a hard time with Li lately. She has been thinking that he is doing things on purpose when they are accidents. Then she says something or does something physical to Li (not usually physical, but the other night it was a kick!!) and that sets off Li and an argument or in the case of the other night, a brawl breaks out. Yikes! It took some protecting, lots of time, and talking to each of them and finally them with each other before things settled down. Then they were both very kind to each other the rest of the night. Just now I went into the living room because I heard Katie getting upset at Li for somehow causing her book to close. I asked Li if it was an accident and he said yes. Katie grew calmer and said she didn't realize that. All is okay now. Although I probably should get myself in the other room with them instead of being on the computer away from everyone. I feel a little guilty taking some time for myself on the computer. But I really want to check email and jot down some of our latest things happenning in our lives.
Makana just put her used breakfast/lunch plate in the kitchen sink all by herself. She cleans up after herself much of the time (and we don't ask her to, she just does it) - how nice for me as it makes it easier to finish cleaning. Li is beginning to put his dishes in the kitchen on the counter (with asking...but I am okay if he doesn't want to, but I figure it can't hurt to ask!). And Katie...well, she still gets up from the table and leaves her dishes and stuff there. She gets quickly involved in other things and has not much interest in doing clean up. We love her still! (As of course love is not dependent on how tidy one is!)
Li is really enjoying karate classes. Last night though, he was having so much fun playing with the Speno boys that he opted to do an extra lesson next week and skip it last night. So glad they all have so much fun together. And glad karate classes are offerred four times each week and you can pick and choose and change when you go. Li had been asking to go three times this week. I will have to chk on that as I am not sure that is okay or not. I think you can only go two times a week unless you are making up a class.
Meanwhile, Li was in the shower. He had just finished pooping and had wiped himself and there were no things from the bathroom in the hallway. The rugs, garbage basket, lotion, toothbrushes, book basket, etc were all in their normal places. The toilet paper was in it's place too. I was surprised he had not taken out the usual things and mentioned this to him so in a casual way while he was making a bath. He said that he wanted to start going to the bathroom the way we all go. I replied that he could do whatever he felt like at the time. Inside I was thinking about how exciting it is how people think about things internally and then make decisions reflecting their latest thoughts. How amazing! And Li is very much a thinker. He cares so much and really takes in things even though outwardly one wouldn't know that. He cares so much about fairness and kindness and generousity*. In the past, I sometimes wondered if I'd be wiping for alot longer. This would be fine to me, but I worried sometimes that he would always need us too and wondered how he would get on in the world if we weren't there to help. And I know that was a silly thought as he has wiped sometimes in the past few months, but not often and that most children do eventually want to wipe themselves as they get older. And if not, that would be a need Jim and I would help him with for as long as possible just like anything else.
* Katie is having a hard time with Li lately. She has been thinking that he is doing things on purpose when they are accidents. Then she says something or does something physical to Li (not usually physical, but the other night it was a kick!!) and that sets off Li and an argument or in the case of the other night, a brawl breaks out. Yikes! It took some protecting, lots of time, and talking to each of them and finally them with each other before things settled down. Then they were both very kind to each other the rest of the night. Just now I went into the living room because I heard Katie getting upset at Li for somehow causing her book to close. I asked Li if it was an accident and he said yes. Katie grew calmer and said she didn't realize that. All is okay now. Although I probably should get myself in the other room with them instead of being on the computer away from everyone. I feel a little guilty taking some time for myself on the computer. But I really want to check email and jot down some of our latest things happenning in our lives.
Makana just put her used breakfast/lunch plate in the kitchen sink all by herself. She cleans up after herself much of the time (and we don't ask her to, she just does it) - how nice for me as it makes it easier to finish cleaning. Li is beginning to put his dishes in the kitchen on the counter (with asking...but I am okay if he doesn't want to, but I figure it can't hurt to ask!). And Katie...well, she still gets up from the table and leaves her dishes and stuff there. She gets quickly involved in other things and has not much interest in doing clean up. We love her still! (As of course love is not dependent on how tidy one is!)
Li is really enjoying karate classes. Last night though, he was having so much fun playing with the Speno boys that he opted to do an extra lesson next week and skip it last night. So glad they all have so much fun together. And glad karate classes are offerred four times each week and you can pick and choose and change when you go. Li had been asking to go three times this week. I will have to chk on that as I am not sure that is okay or not. I think you can only go two times a week unless you are making up a class.
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